Well everyone, I have decided that I will update my blog since being home; it's all about my mission and being home is part of it. As it be God's will, I am not done with my mission! Wednesday night I returned home safely and got released as a missionary of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. It was a tough day. Though I think I will start a couple of Mondays ago just to catch you up. (So prepare yourself for the longest post you'll ever see on here! Ha ha.) So last that was heard from me was all about the week that I struggled and that was on January 11th! Since then much has happened!
So starting Monday, January 11th and going through now I've have been on the BIGGEST emotional roller coaster of my life! I mean, don’t get me wrong, I LOVE roller coasters. But I kinda like the ones that don't affect emotions and only last like 4 minutes long ;) So here's how my life has been for the past few weeks!
Monday, January 11th
Today was P-Day and I had just spent a whole week sick in bed and wanted more than anything to just be normal and be able to work again! My mom, being the angel that she is, spent the time to send me a dozen recipes from home that I could make and start taking to members homes if it was food that was causing all the problems. So we ran all the normal errands that we needed to and then got the ingredients from Walmart to make my mom's BEST meal; lasagna <3<3<3 We went to a sweet member's home to make it, the McGary's. So I cooked this fabulous lasagna and got it all prepared for dinner that we were going to later that night and unfortunately that dinner was one of the more painful ones that I had had in awhile. Granted the past week we hadn't gone to dinners... it was still a pretty bad stomach ache that came on. My stomach got really big and bloated and I just thought that it was gas or something that came from the lasagna but we ended up going home, not being able continue.
Tuesday January 12th
I woke up with the same stomach ache I went to bed with. It was a very frustrating occurrence. We studied that morning and I was given this picture of Christ on a card for Christmas by our Sister-Training-Leaders and I just stared at that picture for pretty much the whole hour. I just think to myself, "What if Christ was really reaching His hand down to me and I physically grabbed it? What then? What would I have to say to him?" So for companion study we studied Christ and His infinite Atonement and what it can do for us. I love the scripture in Alma 7:11-13 that reads,
"And he shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people.
And he will take upon him death, that he may loose the bands of death which bind his people; and he will take upon him their infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to succor his people according to their infirmities.
Now the Spirit knoweth all things; nevertheless the Son of God suffereth according to the flesh that he might take upon him the sins of his people, that he might blot out their transgressions according to the power of his deliverance; and now behold, this is the testimony which is in me."
Christ died for me! He suffered for ME. He knows exactly how I am feeling and how to comfort me, though he might not be able to take away the pain, He can comfort me. And He has, and still does! For that I am so grateful.
Later that day we went to service at the Arvada Independent-Living home. We walked in and were a little early so we decided we would go and see a less-active member and as we were walking up the stairs I totally biffed it, fell and hurt my knee so bad! It was so funny and so not funny at the same time! Haha. I can tell you that I have never fallen and gotten up so dang quick! My companion was laughing so hard, she's such a sweet person! Haha. Once we got to the top we tried to go and see this lady but had elevator problems and I thought my knee was nearly broken so we just sat down and play a round of checkers. My companion didn't know how to play, though I simply explained the rules and went easy on her, she ended up flipping the board after I hopped over 3 pieces in one try. See now I was playing easy… But that was in the beginning of the game ;) Haha. It was fun! Though as we sat there, not only does my stomach hurt like normal, but now my knee feels broken! We wondered how in the world we were going to play balloon volleyball! My companion just told me to pray that some elders would randomly show up and play (even though this was totally Arvada 5th ward's area and place for service.) So we prayed! Kind of halfheartedly because we just were going to push through and were making a joke! But 15 minutes later we go downstairs and turn the corner and we see some people already playing… and then there were 2… 4…..6! What in the world! There were 3 pairs of Elders there, RANDOMLY! Hahaha. Oh my heck it was so funny!! We laughed and laughed and said we needed to be praying even more than we already were because our faith was just so strong! :P It was a better day. Still full of pain, but much better!
|The incredible picture of Christ|
Wednesday, January 13th
We FINALLY got to go to the doctors! Oh man, we were SO excited. After 11 days it was finally allowed! Haha. We went with the sweetest member in our ward and she took us to the doctor! She got to know me pretty well… :P I am so beyond grateful for Sister Shannan Wright and all that she has done to love and care for us! The doctor wasn't much help, though did prescribe some nausea/vomiting meds and that helped a lot to keep more food down. So did not eating though and that's kind of what ended up happening. But I started on some Omeprazole and that didn't really seem to help at all, but I decided I would give it a few days because it says it doesn't work right away but I can tell you that 2 weeks later it's still not helping. So that can be a little discouraging! But I know that there is something out there that will help me, we just have to find it. I had some blood taken and then I was given the kit for a stool test. Haha. Man, Sister Wright and Sister Borup just thought that was the funniest thing in the world! (But they aren't the ones who had to take it!!) But such a miracle occurred that day! Right after the doctor's appointment we got a call from the mission home that there was a huge box of food for me from someone and that I should come and pick it up now and so we did and it was seriously HUGE! Sister Kristi Bair is so thoughtful!! It was full of all my favorite foods too!! The sweetest lady from Pasco that used to live just down the street from us, but now lives in Colorado, had gathered all of this stuff together and dropped it off for me! I was squealing from excitement! Heavenly Father still continues to bless me despite this crazy trial! He still uses people to help me, my blessings are just SO many!! It was such a treat.
Thursday, January 14th
Thursday was just another crazy day! I woke up at the normal time, but Sister Borup didn't get up. And I usually wake her once or twice and then she'll get up but I tried three times and she just rolled over! So I got up and got ready and studied and then it was like 10:30 and all the sudden she is running out of our room throwing up!! What the heck!!! So after cleaning up and getting her showered and cooled down we figured out that it was something in the food we ate at a place called Sweet Tomatoes the night before because I threw everyyyything up in the middle of the night and I guess it just took her longer haha. Never again will I eat at Sweet Tomatoes!! It was a crazy start to our day to say the least :P Also, I got a call from the Doctor's that my blood test had come in and that everything was normal. So that was good, and bad! Haha. So now the stool test just needed to be done and then we would wait on those results. We did get out and work that night, but we just tracted - so nothing too crazy!
Friday, January 15th
Today was a better day! I stopped throwing up so much this week, though I also stopped eating. It just was hard to eat when I knew it was going to hurt my stomach, it didn't look appealing and I feared throwing it up! But we planned for the following week and next 6 week transfer because we knew we'd be together. We planned to read a book called Jesus the Christ, to knock on 1,001 doors, and have a baptism. We were so excited! Also that day I went to counseling that my mission president and his wife set me up for just to hit all of our options and that was… okay. Haha. He wasn't really the most helpful and just told me that he thought it was completely medical….. soooo it was kind of a big waste of the hour and then some drive down. But we had a good time in the car so I guess that made up for it! We stopped by some member's home that day and visited and tried to take it easy.
Saturday, January 16th
Today was Sister Borup's 13 month mark so I got up earlier and made her breakfast to celebrate! At the time I wasn't eating any meat or dairy in efforts to help my stomach and so Sister Borup heard me cookin' she sprinted up the stairs and started yelling at me for making eggs and how that wasn't going to help me feel better and that it wasn't worth it!! And when she finally calmed down I explained that they were for her and her 13 months and she felt so bad so we laughed and laughed about it! I appreciate her so much though, trying all that she can to help me feel better. She is truly my best friend! Then we went and watched some Young Women in the ward play basketball and then we played for a bit. Then we had brought our lunches there and during our lunch hour I played piano and it was so great! I am so grateful that I can play piano and comfort my aching soul! (I wish my stomach…. but my soul is just as good at times like this ;)) After that we went out and tried to tract for a bit, but I ended up breaking down again in pain and so we just kind of rested in the car and read our scriptures to try and give my stomach time to calm down before dinner. It didn't help much but we read some good stuff! Then we went to dinner and the sweet lady, Sister Graham, made a meal for an army!! She made some kind of chili and it was spicy spicy spicy. And needless to say, it did NOT, whatsoever, sit well with my stomach. So after dinner we were over in the area and went to the Wright's and sadly enough all that food left my body in a very quick manner through the top half. Haha. That night after dinner was a hard one. It was so frustrating! I laid on their couch in pain and disbelief. We talked with them and they tried to feed me but nothing help and my level of discouragement had just skyrocketed. I thought I was doing better and that we were going to be fine!! That night I cried all the way home and myself to sleep. I guess Sister Borup called Sister Mendenhall that night in frustration just worried sick and trying to find a way to help me. Though an awesome thing about that night was that the Wright's son, Shad, who is down at Rexburg, bought cupcakes and delivered them to sweet Jeremy and Amie for their birthdays that were both that weekend! I was so thrilled! Heavenly Father is so sweet to me, again, despite this tough trial!
|Fun at the Docs|
|My mom would be so proud!|
|Sister Wright and my beautiful companion Sister Borup|
|The miracle box from Sister Kristi Bair!!|
|Welcome to the Nelson pharmacy, how can I help you??|
We have more in the back ;)
|Oh, the stool test|
|My silly companion just thought it|
was the funniest thing.....
|"It's like a little science project" -Dr. Jane|
|Happy Birthdays! Thanks a bunch Shad!!|
Sunday, January 17th
Well we woke up and I got ready like normal. We had a meeting to get to by 7:30 so when Sister Borup was lolly-gagging I was wondering what was up. Then it was 7:35 and she was still downstairs so I went down to get her and she said we weren't going to the meeting and that we needed to talk. Then we go into our beds and sit down and she starts crying. Man, I was so nervous! Haha. She called Sister Mendenhall when I went to bed and talked to her and was really worried about me and the fact that my health wasn't getting better and that she just didn't know what to do anymore and so I guess Sister Mendenhall said that it might be a possibility that I go home and figure it out and then come back. Man, we cried for an hour and a half talking about the possibility that I go home. We went to church that day and then we were supposed to come back home and rest. Then around 7pm we went to the Mendenhall's home and talked. And cried! Last week at this same time we had mentioned home, but now it was becoming a reality. I just wasn't getting better and I needed to face it. They said that if the stool results came back normal that I really needed to come home because they just didn't want me to continue to suffer and desire to work, but physically can't. It was a hard night, that's for sure.
Monday, January 18th
Happy 2 months to me out in the field! And Happy P-Day! It was a good day. We celebrated Aubrey Wright's birthday and went to the church and played basketball with her and her sweet family. I also had packed up some stuff that I didn't need because an Elder was headed home to Richland on Wednesday and had room in his luggage, which turned out to be an incredible blessing!! It was a good day! Unfortunately, that night we went to the Mendenhall's again and it was decided (after many many tears and prayers) that I needed to go home and get better because nothing was helping me or could relieve my pain and I just knew in my heart that that stool test was going to come back normal and that there was no need to wait anymore because the pain was just unbearable. So I called my parents and my stake president and told them. My parents accepted it and were determined from that very phone call to get me back out to Colorado as soon as possible! I am so lucky to have parents like them. That night me and Sister Borup just cried and cried.
|My sweet, crafty companion made me this!|
Tuesday, January 19th
Well today was my last full, official day so we decided to go to member's homes and say our "See ya laters!" It was hard. Many many tears. We went to the McGary's and the Mason's and the Wright's and Sister Graham's. It was very bitter-sweet. But sweet because I realized just how many people loved and cared for me and how great the relationships we developed were. I packed some of my stuff and went to the doctors to get paperwork and guess what? The stool results came back normal. I was so glad that I had followed the prompting to say the hard words and to go home for a time to figure out what was wrong and get better so I could stop suffering faster. We went to the Wright's home and decorated Aubrey's room for her birthday, that was actually that day, and so that was fun. We also were able to go out to dinner with them and that was fun too!
Wednesday, January 20th--The day I went home.
Well, I woke up this day crying and ended it the same way. This day has so far been the hardest day of my life. I woke up at 5am and just couldn't sleep because of the pain so I woke Sister Borup up and we played Phase 10 until it was time to get up and I totally won! We talked and cried and got ready for the day. We had a big missionary-wide conference that morning and it was pretty crazy. We had to drive a little over an hour to get down there and we had a good time reading scriptures that bring comfort and solace to aching souls. I am so so SO grateful for the scriptures and the comfort they bring me. I love the words of God! The conference was super good and lasted two hours long. Afterwards we left and we ran some last minute errands and went and did laundry and finished packing. It was so hard!! We then went and picked up Sister Borup's new companion and that was not the easiest either. We drove to the mission office and waited a half an hour for my mission president and his wife to be ready to go and then came the hardest part, saying goodbye to Sister Borup. Man, if I ever did cry!! I love her so much. She has truly become my best friend, and the bestest friend I have ever had. It won't be the last time I see her, that's for sure!! I'll be back! We sped to the airport and barely made it in time to check my luggage and then I said more goodbyes and cried even more. My flight was a long, agonizing 2 hours full of many tears. Though I did make a new friend on it! Her name is Kayla and I invited her to church and it was awesome! She is a sweet, talkative girl. After the flight I came crying to my parents and went and got released as a full-time missionary. Then I came home and cried and unpacked. My stomach started doing it's thing by expanding, or distending a ton, and becoming as hard as a rock and putting me in some immense pain in just the few hours I had been home. It worried my mom but I decided we could just go to the ER in the morning and that I would rather sleep. Soo I tried to sleep but just cried and cried because I so badly wanted to be back in Colorado and out of pain! But I eventually fell asleep at 3 and woke up at 5.
|Sweet Sister Wright!!|
|More to go!|
|In the act....|
|The kindest Sister Graham|
|The dear McGary family|
|Happy birthday Aubrey Wright!! #17|
|My best friend|
|Kayla from the plane!|
Thursday, January 21
We went to the ER that morning and they did nothing for me. They basically ruled out life-threatening diseases by taking my blood and urine and said that I need to go to my normal doctor. So if you can imagine, that was frustrating. I went and saw a couple people that day and that was about it. I was tired and weak and in pain.
Friday, January 22
Today I had had an appointment with my family doctor and it went really well! We didn't get answers, but we did get a plan of action to try and figure this out. So the next step was ultra sounds, one of my abdomen and one of my pelvis. So we were very blessed as we went down to schedule them. It was initially going to be February 2nd that we would have to wait for this and as we asked if there were any other available times that they might have all of the sudden a cancellation popped up and we got in that night for one and had on scheduled for Sunday! It was such a tender mercy. Even though I have to go through this he still blesses me and gives me reason to have hope. I am so fortunate! That night I went in for the ultra sound and it was incredible painful on my sensitive stomach but I just hope that something comes up from it!
Saturday, January 23
My mom and I woke up and made cookies for people and studied from the New Testament. Later that day we took our goodies out to people and we felt so good! I am so serious, if you are struggling or think that life is so hard for you--just serve others! You forget about yourself and your problems and just feel so good inside! I love it so much. I went and visited some people and that was good. So many people are so supportive and loving towards me, and it gets even better!
Sunday, January 24
Today was such a good day! I love the Sabbath so much. I was sort of nervous to go to church, but quickly those feelings vanished as I went and the sweetest little girl, Annabelle, came running up to me to sit on my lap and tell me that she hopes I can feel better! It just made my heart melt. So many people at church were just so loving and welcoming. I am so blessed and fortunate to have such a caring and concerned ward! Heavenly Father, again, blessed me! In later meetings I was even able to hold the cutest little baby that just made my heart melt again! I missed kids so much. I love church so much!! Afterwards we went home and then I quickly went to another ward because that Elder that took my stuff home was giving his homecoming talk and I said I would go! It was pretty good. Afterwards I went and saw some of my favorite people and just came home later that night so grateful for all that I am blessed with as I go through this painful, frustrating trial. Thanks to each one of you for your love and support. It means more than you know! If there is ANYthing I can do for you as I am home please, please, please let me know because I would be more than willing to help! And if you made it to the end of this blog post I am so incredibly proud because this is nearly a mile long!!
Love no matter what,
|"Oh so fun!"|
|How I really felt haha :P|
|Oh, I love needles!|
|Makin' myself comfy at the Doctor's|
|The final result!!|
|My favorite little brother, Bubba Ray!|
(He's thrilled that I'm home again ;)